Communicating in English with your Thai partner can be complicated. The odds are English will be the easiest way to communicate, at least at the start of your relationship. It’s unlikely that foreigners will speak Thai and English is a language Thai people should have experience with. If English is not your native language then it may act as a neutral language you can both communicate in.
The problem is that communicating in English with your Thai partner isn’t as simple as learning the language. There are numerous hurdles and obstacles to clear communication.
Communication is Key
Without being able to communicate clearly it will be difficult to build your relationship. Whilst there are people here who communicate in broken English, Thai or another language it is undeniable that it isn’t an ideal situation.
In relationships there are lots of complex topics you need to talk about and without being able to understand each other you’ll run into problems.
Do You Really Understand Each Other?
There could be many reasons why either partner could pretend to understand what the other has said. The obvious reason your Thai partner will say they understand you is because they think they do! There is always the chance they take a meaning from what you’ve said which is not quite right. If your Thai partner has a good level of English then they might understand most of what you say so don’t feel they make mistakes.
However, even with a good level of English your partner might not always understand you.
Saving Face
Culturally Thai people might not like to admit they don’t understand your English as it could cause them to lose face. They may be embarrassed that they don’t understand you especially if you’ve repeated the point or are around other people.
This could lead to your partner either just saying yes or not responding to you. Either way this will lead to problems.
To help avoid this either be open with your partner that it’s ok to check things with you or translate into Thai sometimes.
Grading Your Language
Any teachers will know that you have to grade your language to the students in the class. If you’re speaking to elementary students you use shorter, easier words.
If your Thai partner has weak English then don’t use long words, slang or idioms if you can help it. Think about what you’re saying and if there’s an easier way to do it. In the same way don’t be too condescending. Don’t use pigeon English as it won’t help your partner improve.
Accents
I’ll be honest and say I find it difficult to understand some people speaking English with strong accents. If native speakers find it difficult to understand you then your Thai partner may too, even if their English level is high.
Whilst it’s not easy to change your accent, you can try speaking slower and allow your partner to understand you in the long run.
Your English is Bad
If English isn’t your native language then there is always the chance that it’s your English which is causing the problem. Sure it’s great that you can speak English but if you make mistakes with vocab or grammar then it could cause confusion for your Thai partner.
If this is the case then either start learning Thai or both get some English lessons.
You're Probably Not The Best Teacher For Your Partner
Even if you are actually an English teacher then I’d say you’re not the best person to teach your partner English.
I always noticed that on a lot of dating profiles Thai women want a man who can help them learn English but I couldn’t think of anything worse. Having an informal class with your Thai partner would be horrible, especially if they are not really into English. It can cause stress between partners. Do yourself a favor and get your partner a different English teacher if they need extra help.
On the other hand if your partner just needs help with the odd word here and there then there’s no issue with helping out. If you do this in the right way its a good way for your partner to learn.
Communicate in Another Language
If you are a good speaker of Thai then it’s possible to chat with your partner in their own language. You will probably have some of the issues mentioned before but the other way around. There will be times you don’t understand some words or there are slang terms used which are new or confusing to you.
If you live outside Thailand in a non-English speaking country then it’s likely your partner will get lots of practice using your native language. This is possible for those who are in long term relationships or married but probably not possible for those in new relationships.
Communicating With Your Thai Partner in English
If you’re serious about your relationship with your Thai partner then communication and language is a vital step. Couples who can’t clearly understand each other will have extra hurdles to jump.
Your partner doesn’t need amazing English but if you are talking about serious issues then you need to be sure they understand you. Don’t be afraid to double check and use Thai if needed for difficult words and phrases.
Praise your partner’s English if you see improvement and give them encouragement if they’re taking classes. In the end if someone is making the effort to learn your language they are showing a commitment to you, show them how much it means to you.
Through this you should create an atmosphere where communication in English is possible and your partner feels confident to use it with you. You should be positive and not nitpick on little errors which will undoubtedly happen. In the end if you can’t communicate with someone then you probably shouldn’t be together. Either work together on this or it might be the beginning of the end.
